I haven’t written in a while, mainly because I have been so overwhelmed with school work. But I thought I would drop a line to catch up with reepicheepsrant. Here is what God is doing. I am still growing, thank God for this, because he is the reason. I am constantly fighting depression these days. Today is a good day though. I am learning that God is often found to be working away from where I think he should be working.
I have been studying Elijah for a few weeks now. In the story, Elijah prays that there would be no rain for three and a half years. He then has a showdown with the prophets of baal. He humiliates them and makes much of God. But then there has been a point of the text that I never really understood. Jezebel gets mad and threatens his life. The text then says he fears and runs. How can a man who just did what he did fear? It doesn’t flow with the text. Here is what I have found out. Barclay points out that the word fear could also mean, he saw. His eyes were opened. THis changes things for me. It means that Elijah saw what God was doing, and then his eyes were really opened.
Let’s not get too quick to judge him. I do this too, and I would lay odds that you do too. I see what God is doing, and then I run ahead of him. Think about it, Elijah has been showing God as big for four years! He sees what God is doing. God must be showing himself big and then making Carmel his showdown at the OK coral. Then when God is proven to be the real God, Israel will repent and it will go back to the days of David and the United Kingdom. But then a twist in the story. The king goes back to the queen and the queen calls the shots. She decides to kill the prophet of God. Elijah’s eyes were open to see that Israel’s king would not repent, and that Israel likewise would not follow God. We get upset when our Disciple Now t-shirts don’t turn out well. Elijah “saw” that God did not act as He should.
What was God response? He fed Elijah and let him rest. Then he carried him to a mountain. He did not come in the fire or in the wind, he came in a whisper. God does not move like we think he should, and we should praise him for it. He moves with divine love and knowledge. It tells me that I need to, minute by minute, approach God with what he wants. Not to see the trajectory and run ahead, but no matter how much he grows me, that I should approach him with every move.
God, please don’t stop crushing me with divine love and persistence.